The other morning I was driving to work, listening to the news, and I pulled up next to a dog going number two. Our eyes locked, while the owner stood by. I could see the exertion in the eyes. The dog calmly returned my stare. I noticed the curve of the spine, the hind legs hunched together for support. My gaze did not alter the proceedings, so to speak, in any way.
I drove off from the stop sign as the news went on about world leaders meeting at a global summit. Now that would be something, I thought, if prior to meeting the leaders had to lock eyes with each other while going number two, and then had to pick up each other’s poop with a little baggie.
A leader afterward might say to an aide something like, “You know that tariff I was thinking of imposing on _____, well forget it. I’ve had a change of heart.”
The Faucet 